Sunday, April 29, 2012

How Rumors Get Started

I was at the grocery store with Dave and Ryan when my nephew called me to see what kind of Goldfish Crackers my kids eat.  The following is what happened when I hung up:

Dave:  What did Will want?
Me:  To know what kind of goldfish the kids eat.
Dave:  Why?
Me: She is at the store and saw them on sale.
Ryan:  Grandma is getting us Goldfish?
Me:  Yes.
Ryan:  What happens when they die?
Me:  Goldfish Crackers, not a real goldfish.
Ryan:  Oh good, we have enough pets. 

It is impossible for me to say anything to Dave when the kids are around without them getting into it with us.  It drives me CRAZY!

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Is Vision Really That Important?

I have a confession to make....are you ready?  I hate to go to the eye doctor.   It is the only doctor that has ever caused me to cry.  Dentist?  No problem.  Who thought it would be a good idea to make someone stick their head into a machine and then literally shoot air at your eye with the sound effects to match?  I am scarred for life.  (If you cry and hyperventilate they mark your chart stating that you will freak the hell out and it would be better to use the drops.)  I have wanted to do corrective surgery for years but they keep telling me I am not a candidate since I am so freaked out I can hardly open my eyes when in the presence of an eye professional. 

I have had issues for years with going to the eye doctor.  I would avoid the whole thing except for my 20/650 vision and need to wear contacts.  It seems that they like you to get your prescription renewed every year to purchase new contacts.  I didn't think I would have an anxiety attack taking Colin.  Alas, I was wrong. 

Colin has been having headaches that cause stomach aches and we are trying to figure out what is causing it.  I took him to the eye doctor to make sure his vision was not the issue.  We went to the same eye doctor that I went to when I first got glasses, and when I walked into the room that has the puff machine I had to sit down.  I tried not to react because I didn't want Colin to have this phobia, but holy shit, that thing is evil!  As he stuck his head in the machine that has the hot air balloon in it I started to get a sick feeling in my stomach.  Thank God they didn't do the air test or I would have required prescription intervention.  The sound haunts my dreams.   We went into the actual exam room and I was doing the nervous talking.  You know the one where you are talking and all you want to do is stop, but the harder you try the more you talk until you have talked yourself into a corner and then the doctor was looking at me like I was crazy. By an act of God I managed to shut the heck up and we moved along. 

Dr. Andy did his tests and said that Colin had perfect vision, but that since we were there he might as well dilate his pupils and make 100% sure that it wasn't a focus issue.  We did the drops and had to wait for 30 minutes for them to work their magic.  If Colin can't read he is fidgety and he was walking around the waiting room.  This is a problem when your eyes are dilating and he kept bumping into things.  I made him sit down when he apologized to the chair after he ran into it. 

By the time we got back into the exam room I was in a full blown anxiety attack.  I wanted to crawl out of my skin, or at least wait in the car until it was over.  Since neither one of those were an option I sucked it up and sat with my eyes covered.  Dr. Andy actually asked me if I was okay.  I mentioned that I have anxiety with eye doctors and he looked at me like I was crazy.  He quickly finished the exam and got the heck out of the room. 

The conclusion I have come to is that Dave is now in charge of all eye care appointments.  There are not enough relaxation techniques in the world to make me go through that again.  It is bad enough that I have to go myself, but I am drawing the line in the sand.  As God is my witness, I will never take my children to a vision appointment again!  My blood pressure will thank me. 

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Random Thoughts for April

Just because you can, doesn't mean you should.  For example, just because you can eat an entire bag of Snickers Mini's you bought for your kids Easter Baskets doesn't mean that you should as you will get a stomach ache and your kids will get skimpy treats. 

It is better to get treats that you don't like for the Easter Baskets.  See reasons above. 

Again, I would like to remind all ladies that tights are not meant to be worn as pants.  An exception can be made if you are running, but then must be changed before going anywhere else. 

Today I was looking for a pair of underwear in the unfolded laundry.  Ryan was so generous when he told me that I could borrow a pair of his.  He said they were soft and very stretchy.  There is no cotton in the world that can make a pair of underwear made for a 6 year old fit me.  I think this is a good thing. 

I am so happy that I was born into my family.  That is all I am saying on this subject. 

Even if you live a charmed life, sometimes you just need to give yourself a day to feel sorry for yourself.  Is it wrong that I want a bigger house or a nicer wardrobe?  Is it bad that I want to have a day to myself?  I love and appreciate what I have, but I would really like more.  I had that day earlier this week and it has past, but I feel better for having felt it. 

As a follow-up to my post titled "Better Things", the one where the lady was snotty as she reprimanded me for Max pooping on her lawn without me seeing, she walked past my house with her dog the other day, and I have never wanted a dog to poop on my lawn more than that day.  Of course, she is perfect with her perfect dog and he didn't even look at me.  Damn dog.

As a follow up to Jury Duty, it was reported today in the Akron Beacon Journal that the defendant was found guilty.  I feel good about this and can now let this rest.  Again, thank the good Lord above that I didn't have to sit on this trial as I would have been scarred for life.  One of the jurors fell asleep during closing arguments and had to be dismissed.  How does that happen after listening to testimony for 5 days? 

Finally, I have two new public followers.  Welcome Anne and Jeff.  Glad to have you aboard, and thanks for letting me know you are here! It is a boost to my ego to know that someone besides my family reads this.  Anne, I have visited your site as well and love what I see.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Jury Duty and The Cat in the Hat

Last Sunday was Easter.  It seems like from the time I was woken up by Colin to start the Easter basket hunt, until this very moment, I have been going at full steam ahead.  It was a bumpy ride along the way, but I made it.

My normal week usually involves a full slate of kids, school, house stuff, cooking, cleaning, and oh, by the way, I do have a job.  This week we added in Jury Duty, two doctors appointments, a volunteer meeting, several conference calls, two funerals and oh yeah, the kids were off school on Monday. 

I had to report for Jury Duty at the the courthouse on Monday.  I have been called several times before and have never made it out of the basement waiting room.  I usually end up sitting next to someone that wants to sell me Mary Kay or Pampered Chef.  This time I was prepared with a fully charged Kindle with several books loaded that I have been wanting to read.  Let me tell you what happens when you want to sit in the basement waiting room.  You get called to sit on a homicide trial, that is what. 

I was in the first group of people to be called.  I hadn't even read two pages of my book when they called my name.  I was juror # 19 so I was feeling pretty confident that I would not be picked until they told us what the case was about.  It was aggravated vehicular homicide.  I will spare you the details because it was pretty gruesome and really complicated.  If you want to see the specifics, you can check it out here. They start by asking each person about educational background, current job and if you have ever had any experience with court.  Out of 31 people, there were only about 4 that had not been to traffic court.  We finished that after about 90 minutes, and then each side got to talk about the jury selection process and ask additional questions. 

Let me say that the courtroom was about 90 degrees, and that is no exaggeration.  I was starting to sweat after about five minutes, and by the time they started asking more direct questions I was starting to experience deodorant fade-out.  The more I worried about that, the more I thought I was starting to smell.  It was a vicious circle.  I was sitting in the front row of the gallery and they kept asking me direct questions.  There were 30 other people and they called on me so many times that the other jurors knew my name.  The more questions they asked, the more I was sweating.  By the time I was dismissed, I felt like I had a dirt cloud around me like Pigpen in the Peanuts cartoons.  Thank the good Lord that I was dismissed, because that trial would have scarred me for life.  I have been following it in the paper and I think I might still be scarred for life. 

The week ended last night with 12 of my family members going to a high school production of "Seussical the Musical".  When my mom called and asked me if I wanted to go I said yes thinking that it would be like any other week when I am looking for any reason to get out of my house.  Also, Laura was in town, and when she is here I like to spend as much time with her as possible, not to mention with my lovely nieces, Erin and Cara and my nephew Andrew.  They are growing up so fast.   This was not the case this week as I would have rather been watching TV from my bed.  The kids did a great job, but I was reminded once again how much I dislike The Cat in the Hat.  I was also suffering from some intestinal distress, so it was a long couple of hours. 

Today has been a lovely day to rejuvenate me and get me ready to start it all over again.  It is great weather outside and Ryan and I are going to take Max to the dog park.  I will be ready to start all over again for next week.  It is Dessert Extravaganza week and there are still tickets available if you are interested and local.  We would love to see you there!

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Not the Easter Miracle We Hoped For

I have written several times about our neighbor Quinn.  She came barrelling into the world a month early on the bathroom floor and commanded attention for every second of her short life.  I learned a lot from this baby, and I only met her once. 

1.  It is possible and necessary to find joy in the smallest things.  Her family could have fallen into only seeing how horrible this disease was for their precious baby.  Instead, they were able to take notice of the smiles they would get from her, and appreciate them for what they were.  Also, for Quinn to even smile with such pain is amazing in and of itself.  I understand that I take these things from my children for granted and I have been trying to live in the moment.  I am getting much better at this. 

2.  Never give up.  This family was searching for help as soon as this diagnosis was suggested to them.  They got her into a trial program and she was the youngest baby to ever receive a bone marrow transplant for this condition.  Marc and Mandy faced this head on, and they were amazing advocates for their baby.  Nobody knew her better, and they could often determine the problems before the doctors.  I hope they can take comfort in knowing that they did everything that could have been done, and then went and did more.  I am sure that they have more training in wound care than many people in the profession will ever get. 

3.  Faith can take you to places you never imagined possible.  The whole family operated with such grace under pressure.  They stayed positive in the darkest of days and were able to show me that my faith that I have been questioning in the past few years is, in fact, an amazing gift that I need to nurture.  I don't know that I could have done what they did, and I am praying that I never have to find out.  I learned that God does not always give you what you want, but he does give you what is best.  While I am having a hard time wrapping my head around this right now, I know that Marc and Mandy do believe this, and I will support them in any way I can. 

4.  Strength comes in many different packages.  I will never question anyone in their fight, and I will not count anyone out until the end.  This baby fought off problems again and again.  How such a tiny body could take on so much will always be a mystery.  She had EB, that is plenty, but then she had a bone marrow transplant, faced several kinds of pneumonia and battled to the very end.   Her fight for life may have ended, but her fight for awareness and a cure has only just begun.  She will continue to make a difference. 

Quinn's butterfly wings have taken her on to a new place, one of peace and no pain.  Her butterfly army will continue to pray for her and her family and hopefully they will also find peace and comfort knowing that their amazing little girl touched so many people in so many ways. 

Monday, April 2, 2012

Better Things

Okay, let me preface this post by telling you I am in a rotten mood.  Please feel free to stop reading now, my feelings won't be hurt, unless I find out, and then I will be more mad directly at you. 

Let me also say that I am a big proponent of people picking up after their pets.  I take this responsibility very seriously as I am a "live and let live" kind of person and I do not want my family to interfere with the happiness of others.  As long as you are not breaking the law and/or getting in my way, it is really none of my business what your lifestyle is. 

So, as I mentioned, I woke up in a bad mood today and then Ryan was his usual uncooperative self while getting ready for school.  Nothing starts your day off better than having a child drag his feet at every single turn, especially on a Monday.  It is a brisk but sunny day here so I decided to take a walk and get some sun and fresh air.  Exercise is supposed to help when you are in a bad mood.  I debated whether or not to take Max and finally decided that I would take him because he deserves to be in the fresh air, too. 

Have I mentioned that I got an iPhone a few months ago?  One of the apps that come with it is Nike+iPad, so I decided to give it a try.  I entered my info and then it said, "Walk around to activate sensor."  I walked for about 1/4 of a mile and it was still saying the same thing.  I stopped to mess with it and Max pooped.  Not to get too graphic, but Max weighs about 17 pounds.  This poop looked like it would do the job for a day or two.  Instead of carrying the poop with me, I left it by the fire hydrant so I could pick it up on my way home.  I proceeded on my way and was walking and messing with my phone trying to get it to play some music or at least do something.  I stopped again as I finally got it to play my theme song, "Better Things" by the Kinks.  Unbeknownst to me, Max pooped again.  With the amount he had already pooped it could not have been any bigger than a peanut M&M.  The home owner was out mowing her lawn and came running up to me and said, "Ma'am, in the future, could you please not let your dog poop on my lawn?"  Of course I was sufficiently mortified and explained that he had already pooped so I left my poop bag and I would swing back and pick it up in a few minutes, and that I was sorry that I didn't notice that he had pooped since I was looking at my phone. 

Now if this had been me and I saw someone let their dog poop on my lawn, I might have said something.  The difference would be that I would have been gracious about the apology instead of being snotty.  Also, did she really think I would let my dog poop on her lawn if she was standing there?  If I was going to let my dog poop in someones yard and not pick it up, which I wouldn't, I would certainly pick a few others before hers. 

I realize that this woman did not know that I was in such a bad mood.  For all I know, this was her straw that broke the camel's back, but seriously, when someone offers a sincere apology, accept it and move on.  Now that I have vented, I am going to move on and let it go. 

That is, unless I see her dog poop in my yard, then it is Game On!

Sunday, April 1, 2012

April Fools

One of the best thing about having older kids is that they are able to get up on their own on the weekend and leave Dave and I to sleep in.  I remember the first time that Ryan got up on his own.  It was like my Birthday and Christmas rolled into one.  I was a new woman!  I am not a morning person on my best day, but to have to get up before 7:00 on a non-work day did not make me the happiest mother around. 

A few years ago we got a new alarm clock that would automatically set the time, and as a bonus it would automatically adjust the time for Daylight Savings.  Shortly after we got the clock they changed when the time change happened so the clock adjusts on the wrong day.  Today was the day it made the change.  I woke up at what I thought was 10:10 and flew out of bed to wake Colin up so he could get ready for PSR (Parish School of Religion) that started at 10:30. 

Colin rolled over and told me that it was really only 9:10 and that I should let him sleep some more.  I told him I didn't think this was funny and he needed to get out of bed RIGHT NOW!  DO I LOOK LIKE I AM IN THE MOOD FOR YOUR ATTITUDE?!?!?!?!  Colin turned his clock around to show me the correct time and then got up because once he was awake he might as well get out of bed. 

He came out and asked me if I knew what day it was, and then pointed out that it was April Fool's day.  I asked him if he changed my clock on purpose and he said no, he didn't, but he wished he had thought of it. 

The problem with having a clever child with a dry sense of humor is that he is capable of pulling these things off.  I put nothing past him these days, hence me accusing him of stealing my cupcakes.  I think these things are becoming a self-fulfilling prophesy when I am always on the lookout for his devious actions.  I should know that my beautiful, angelic child would not put me through such foolishness, Right Colin?

If the truth is to be told, he has never actually done anything like this.  It is the idea that I know he can that holds power over me.  May the good Lord himself help me when he actually does start doing these things or worse.  He is only 12.  It is all downhill from here.